- You're late for the school run because you can only find one school PE trainer. And then when you get home, the trainer turns out to be inside the washing machine. Because, like, where else would a trainer be?
- The dentist tells you that only 10% of patients get an abscess after a wisdom tooth extraction, and only 10% of those people also develop weird scar tissue on their gum that stops them talking properly, and practically nobody then comes out in hives as an allergy to the antibiotic, so in a way you’re actually very special. Lucky you.
- Your daughter corrects you when you tell her teacher the name of Voldemort’s snake and adds, “Mummy wouldn’t know anyway, she’s always falling asleep."
- The energy company phones to tell you it has proactively appointed a legal advisor because your power bill is so high – but they can’t tell you how high, exactly.
- You realise that £500 an hour bill from the barrister didn’t include VAT.
- You take a shower and run into your room wearing the only clean towel in the bathroom, which happens to be a hand towel, and try to quickly close the curtains, only to pull down the ENTIRE sodding curtain rail.
And most of all, you know it’s a bad day when…
- Moments after pulling down the curtain rail, while you’re standing, basically naked at your window, backlit by a 60-watt bulb, you notice that the next door neighbour (also known as your child’s deputy headmaster) has just pulled up and got out of his car.
Brilliant.
Tomorrow’s another day, right? And in the meantime, there are pictures of kittens to be looking at.
