How to Make an Easter Bonnet

I love Sundays, don’t you?

Lazy afternoons made for leisure and relaxation. This weekend we had a family dinner at my parents’ house and stuffed ourselves with my Mum’s excellent cooking. We were just considering going for a walk (or having a nap) when I had one of those heart-in-your-boots moments.

“Oh, bugger. Flea needs to make an Easter bonnet for tomorrow.”

This was swiftly followed by:

“I have no idea how to make an Easter bonnet.”

And:

“What’s an Easter bonnet anyway?”

Seriously, what is it with schools today? Do they think I have nothing better to do on a Sunday afternoon than to wrestle with pipe cleaners and Pritt Sticks?

As it turns out I have the world’s greatest sister-in-law. I’m not only saying that because she’s reading this on Facebook, I’m also saying it because she’s about 10 billion percent better than me at anything involving crafts or home-making.

Anyway, she nipped to a shop for me and bought an Easter Bonnet Making kit for Flea and I to take home and make use of, together with instructions on how to make an Easter bonnet.

Step 1: To begin with, find a bonnet that fits on your child’s head. Argue for 20 minutes about which is the front and which is the back. Decide to give in with good grace, since it makes your child happy to wear it back to front. 

Step 2: Take the pretty decorated eggs from the package and fix them to your bonnet using the sticky squares provided. Get sticky squares stuck to your fingers instead. Tear sticky square in half trying to remove from finger. Decide to use Pritt stick instead before learning that a Pritt Stick has the worst name in history because it singularly fails to make anything stick together EVER. Put wobbly eggs onto hat and reassure child with something like, “It’ll be much less wobbly when it dries.”

Step 3: Wrap ribbon around brim of hat to create lovely, decorative Easter feature. Ask child to cut ribbon in appropriate place. Realise this was a bad idea and your ribbon is now half an inch short. Calm down hysterical child who is weeping, “It doesn’t look right, it’s RUBBISH.”  Attempt to somehow stretch ribbon, in fact causing the ribbon to tear down the middle and start to split along its full length. Give up and patch the whole thing with several yards of Sellotape.

Step 4: Decide to place Easter chicks in jaunty position around brim of bonnet. Realise glue is pointless in attempting to stick chicks to wicker-type material and opt for staples. After staple-related injury, come up with GENIUS idea of sticking tissue-paper ‘straw bales’ to the hat and then sticking the chicks to the straw. No, I don’t know if chicks live on straw bales, but it seemed like a good idea at the time, okay? Except it turns out tissue paper falls apart at the slightest human contact. And if it is coated with glue, it will then attach itself permanently to your clothing, table cloth, floorboars and any surface within 25 yards. 

Step 5: Having constructed straw bales, glue chicks to the tissue paper. Accidentally decapitate two chicks during the sticking process. Remove legs of another chick. Convince child that nine is more than enough chicks for any bonnet.

Step 6: After two hours, six paper cuts, two decapitations, one severing of limbs, two inappropriate uses of profanity and tears on both sides, you too can feel proud of this, erm, creation:

005

I think you'll agree, it could have been a lot worse. 

About 

Sally is a full-time blogger and founder of the MAD Blog Awards and the Tots100, a community of almost 5,000 UK parent blogs. She is also a busy single Mum to Flea, the world's coolest seven year old.

Comments

  1. That’s what we did on Sunday except that after last years fiasco I bought a glue gun and OMG GLUE GUNS ARE SOO MUCH FUN!!!

  2. Oh I should have mentioned it was hot glue HOT GLUE!!

  3. I have to second the glue gun. I love it, but beware you can stick anything with one. I have two bonnets to do next week with the boys

  4. Oh it looks fab and flea looks great in it! I would love a glue gun and this may be a great excuse to get one although Im sure it will get hidden away with my laminator and never used.

  5. Oh thank goodness my kids don’t even know what a spring bonnet is… the amount of “lost chickens” we have because my mother insists on buying every kid about a dozen of those hideous little chickens every Easter and I spend the rest of the year chucking them out… This year I am going to bribe my kids: chickens for chocolate… that way I won’t have to spend an entire year finding them, hiding them, refinding them because I hid them so well, chucking them out and then refinding them because someone thought I was losing my mind and I would never toss a sweet little chicken out? Would I? Would I? – Blimey when motherhood sends you to tossing out tiny chickens you have to wonder what other depths you are going to fall to in the next few years…

  6. Brilliant! Made me chortle.
    So did se7en,s comment!!

  7. What is the actual point of an Easter bonnet though? Honestly? In relation to Christ, it bears no relevance at all (in my humble opinion), just inflicts further craft creation on us Mummies. Not fair!
    Got to admit though, Flea does look gorgeous! x

  8. Hilarious! Oh my lordy, we have sooooooo been there a million times. Massively with you on the glue thing – kit glue is R.U.B.B.I.S.H. Don’t get me started on marshmallow rice crispy cakes though. Lost me 2 pans, 3 spatulas and a baking tray in the bin that did.

  9. Ah but the face in that hat! Too cute! And even though I’ve never seen an Easter bonnet before, I’m sure that’s a very fine one.

  10. I’m a little concerned about you.

  11. Okay, I need a glue gun, then…

  12. Is it wrong that I laughed at your laminator? Just a little bit.

  13. Tossing out tiny chickens? Yep, sounds about par for the course…

  14. I literally have no idea. I thought it was to do with Maypoles, or something. Who knows.

  15. You are a woman after my own heart.

  16. oh, you’re too kind. Thanks!

  17. I just came across this and it is hilarious and um very helpful

  18. Wow, what a lovely bonnet, need to make one with Isabelle too ;) …. have never done before
    Mirka Moore @Kahanka recently posted..Olivia learning to walk with LeapFrog Scout & Friends Baby Walker!My Profile