Who could forget that face?

Flea

Next time you think you're a bad mother, I invite you to come back to read this post. No, really. Because I think I can guarantee you've never had THIS conversation in the car after collecting your precious, beloved offspring from school.

Me: Hey, Flea, you didn’t tell me there was a class photo in your bag. When was this taken?

Flea: I don’t remember.

Me: Oh you’re not in it. That’s a shame. Were we on holiday?

Flea: Don’t know. Please may I have sandwiches for dinner?

Me: Maybe. Oh, I think we were in London. There’s Charlie. And George. And who’s this, next to them?

Flea: That’s Samuel. I think I’ve got raisins in my snack box.

Me: Oh yes, I know Samuel. And look there’s Natasha and Zara. Is that Darcy?

Flea: Yes.  [Flea starts rummaging in the glove box]

Me: Hmm. Who’s this girl here? Is she new?

Flea: Can I have this biscuit?

Me: Sure. Hmm. She’s got a yellow badge, she must be in your house. Who is she? Have a look. What’s that little girl’s name?

Flea: Flea

Me: Eh?

Flea: It’s me, Mummy.

Me: It doesn’t look like you. Are you sure?

Flea: [looks at me like I'm a moron] Yes.

Me: What happened to your hair?

Flea: My teacher brushed it.

That'll be another sterling parenting moment, then. 

About 

Sally is a full-time blogger and founder of the Tots100, Trips100, Foodies100 and HIBS100 communities, along with the MAD Blog Awards. She spends a bit too much time on the Internet. She’s also a very happy Mum to Flea, the world’s coolest ten year old.

32 Comments

  1. 10th June 2010 / 11:03 am

    Sorry, can’t comment. Laughing too hard to type…

  2. mathew
    10th June 2010 / 11:10 am

    are you sure you picked up the right kid? 😉

  3. 10th June 2010 / 11:26 am

    holy crap that is one of the funniest things I’ve read in a long time! Start saving how for therapy!

  4. Liz (LivingwithKids)
    10th June 2010 / 11:35 am

    Absolutely adorable picture. I have all No 1 Sons school pictures in a drawer and I take them out from time to time to remind me how angelic he used to be, and how shiny his hair was when I was the one in charge of washing it.

  5. Carly
    10th June 2010 / 11:48 am

    haha flipping hilarious Sally…pure class 🙂 xxx

  6. 10th June 2010 / 12:43 pm

    My life is inherently ridiculous, it’s true.

  7. 10th June 2010 / 12:45 pm

    Ha ha! In my defence it was one of those TEENY photos that schools send out as proofs, and the teacher had combed Flea’s hair right back so she didn’t have a fringe, making her look very different.
    I know ultimately these are pitiful excuses, but they’re all I have…

  8. 10th June 2010 / 12:45 pm

    I know, I’m giving her so much material to work with in later years, aren’t I?

  9. 10th June 2010 / 2:05 pm

    Oh that is great. absolutely brilliant. do you get any points for recognising all her friends??

  10. 10th June 2010 / 2:10 pm

    I actually spat my tea at the screen, you crack me up. I can not wait to meet you in person. You make me feel that they are such things as rainbows and pots of gold at the end of them

  11. 10th June 2010 / 3:03 pm

    Hmm, don’t know where my comment went. Here it is again:
    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA etc.

  12. 10th June 2010 / 4:40 pm

    That is the funniest thing I’ve read in ages!

  13. 10th June 2010 / 7:55 pm

    I love ‘[looks at me like I’m a moron]’. Flea is just too cool for school. So funny.

  14. 10th June 2010 / 7:58 pm

    Brilliant that’s all I can say

  15. 10th June 2010 / 8:59 pm

    lol, that is fab, sounds much like how my niece would react!

  16. 11th June 2010 / 8:19 pm

    That’s too funny!
    But I can’t make fun of you, because my son was once welcomed by his nursery school teacher with the immortal words “Oooh, a clean face today!” (No milk moustache for once.)

  17. 11th June 2010 / 10:36 pm

    Ha! Nice to know it’s not just me, then.

  18. 11th June 2010 / 10:37 pm

    Crikey, I wouldn’t raise your hopes THAT high.

  19. 11th June 2010 / 10:37 pm

    Oh sure. If only to make me feel a bit less like a complete loser mother.

  20. 11th June 2010 / 10:38 pm

    Whereas I don’t have Flea’s school photos because I get distracted and forget to send the order form back in time. Sigh..

  21. Priness_L_88
    13th June 2010 / 1:43 pm

    ROFL! Oh that’s brilliant!

  22. Michelle Twin Mum
    13th June 2010 / 8:30 pm

    lmao, it has all been said! Great conversation. Mich x

  23. Aly
    14th June 2010 / 9:58 am

    Ah, you have the best things to say.Had to tell hubby this one and the monkey porn one.

  24. Ouidad
    14th June 2010 / 4:20 pm

    This could be the funniest thing I’ve read all year! We love these kinds of child-hair stories! Thanks for sharing!
    -Deb for Ouidad

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